why has my libido gone down since my wife has become pregnant?
Friday, February 12th, 2010 at
11:34 am
Since my wife has become pregnant my libido has gone completely down, and it has been over a month since we had sex last. I do not know why but I do not get turned on anymore, not at all by no one. I believe it will soon crush my marriage.
I would like to know if there are any articles or anything in the subject. If it is normal, if there are other people out there with the same problem, and how some of these people overcame it.
Filed under: Alternative Medicine
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Since you don’t get turned on by anyone, and not just your wife, i think you are going through this pregnancy with her!!!
Believe it or not, it is possible that you are having sympathy pregnancy symptoms. Yes, women do get horny during pregnancy, but….our behavior is more erratic than erotic. It just comes and goes. Its really not steady.
Also, I truly think you are so involved in this event, that you might actually be experiencing what she is experiencing.
Don’t worry, your marriage wont crumble over this. Sex is such small part of the bigger picture.
I suggest you become more intimate on a more emotional level. Be there for each other. Anticipating a birth of your child is a huge event and this could be taking a toll on your sexuality.
You should take this time and enjoy it with your wife. I can tell you right now that every woman wants a man who is capable of intimacy that does not lead to sex every time. Trust me, she will appreciate you now more than ever.
Bond with your pregnant wife and your unborn child. Create intimacy on a more emotional level and believe me, you will find it to be more fulfilling than sex.
Just so you know, what I suggest you should do will lead to sex by the way.
No joke, best sex happens when you are not trying to make it happen.
maybe you are looking at her as a mom and don’t see the sexiness any more?
Being the wife, I can’t relate. But…this is not uncommon. Some men will subconsciously feel that if they have sex with their wife the baby will get hurt. I’d strongly suggest picking up a copy of "What To Expect When You’re Expecting" if she doesn’t already have a copy of it. There is an entire section in the book written specifically for the Father-to-be and that is a question which is addressed. It’s also a good book for her as well if this is your first baby.
You could also just be nervous about impending fatherhood, which is also not uncommon.
*this is just a joke to lighten the mood and make you laugh but relates to the first possibility I’d mentioned* The baby is born, the father holds him/her for the first time. The baby looks at Dada and repeatedly pokes him in the forehead then says "There, how do YOU like it???"
Are you *unable* to become aroused or do you just not become aroused automatically anymore?
Let her get you ready.
And on that note, younger women are sooo accustom to guys just ‘being’ ready they can start to think they are unattractive, you don’t love them anymore etc… etc… if you aren’t. Assure her it’s not the case and let her know sometimes guys need foreplay too.
Stress can kill the autonomic libido and becoming a father is extremely stressful, you might not realize how much.
Might want to talk to the OB, I’m sure there are other dads to be who have this issue, perhaps the OB can make a recomendation.
Glad I didn’t have this problem, we were having sex up until I went into labor. (We heard it caused labor and decided even if it didn’t, we’d have fun trying, lol)